2008

inothernews: I don’t think it.  I quoth it. (via...

Stuff that hits close to home...

I almost wrote about this for the True Crime Report [truecrimereport.com] my paying gig, but...

The Fighting Gacys The following is a heavily edited Google...

True Crime Report

The Burbs: Breeding Grounds For...

Warning -- Some salty language follows. Names [and locations] have been changed or redacted in the following chat transcript to protect the inn-- er, to protect a dude I know.
me: How are things at the [redacted] palazzo out in lovely [redacted]? Missing the good neighbor gossip?
Rollo the Suburban Pimp: There is a darkness lurking behind the friendly waves and well-manicured lawns of our neighborhood.
me: I know, dude. You're my link to the dark undercurrents lurking in southern upper-middle class suburbia. I have neighbors now -- new families with kids who catch the bus with my kids -- but it isn't the same as actually living next door to the folks.
Rollo the Suburban Pimp: Pretty much whatever you can imagine is true. The Southern Baptist scout mom spends her days trolling online for random dick. Their next door neighbors are wife swappers. Down the street, there is a guy building pipe-bombs in his garage. It's real. Believe it.
me: THAT'S FUCKING AWESOME.
Rollo the Suburban Pimp: That's suburbia.

Substitute Special Needs Bus Driver...

First person reportage here, because the autistic kindergarten student is my own child, and the...

Physicists spooked by faster-than-light...

Urg.

Sometimes, I hate being interviewed. I can be very good on my feet, talking off the top of my head....

The White House is Briefed: Phoenix About to...

Think Progress » One Month After 9/11, McCain...

Fresh Intelligence : Radar Online : Choire...

cvxn: soupsoup:seriouslythough:kathlellen:slippy: Twitter...

Good Luck With Your Hell Demons: Dead Monster...

This is gonna seem a little cryptic...

Here, I wrote about why The True Crime Weblog is on hiatus. Sorta. I still cannot say why my crime...

War: War Criminal Websites! [NOT]

Savage Stands by Autism Remarks -...

Oh, yeah, [they] hired someone.

alexbalk: This should be fun. Radar has hired Moe from Jezebel.com — another Gawker blog....

William Petersen’s ‘CSI’ life of crime to end...

Digg Comments From When They Announced...

davidcho: jeffrubinjeffrubin: (almost two years ago to the day) While I will attempt to not...

The True Crime Weblog: Grand Pause: A Letter...

Dick Arrested for Being a Dick

Gwinnett Daily Post | Scattered, smothered,...

My Most Popular Blog: Eh.

Stories from my youth: An Open Letter to...

To read the first ‘story from my youth,’ click this: “Bubba’s Wooden Leg: A...

Local News | 2 of the 5 feet found in B.C....

Gawker Exclusives!: TMZ Steals From the Poor...

We do wear shoes, you know.

fek: “If my kids have a Southern accent, I will kill myself.” NY Sun profiles the 40,000 New...

Waterboarded by Comedy: A Biased and...

The following is an utterly biased and slightly disingenuous review of Michael Ian Black’s...

Payj2000: My favorite thing that...

Denton: Hey, Maer — where's your Jesse Jackson "nuts" piece? (In the same place as all the Burkle coverage?) ;)
Maer: Actually, it's in the same place as our item on you going down on a go-go boy at Urge on Thursday night.. But while we're on the subject, have I missed Gawker's coverage of the Jezebel fiasco?
via Gawker
I've only ever freelanced for Radar -- and spottily, at that -- and I loved the exchange quoted above.

The Ramseys Didn't Do It

The Boulder, CO District Attorney has exonerated the Ramsey family. As far as Boulder is concerned,...

If you live near Roswell or Alpharetta,...

What about that storm tonight? Criminy. Our power was out for 2 hours. Then, once it had been on for...

The One Where Michael Ian Black Takes...

I am not now nor will I ever be in the habit of sharing e-mail exchanges between me and famous...

Schoolgate - Times Online - WBLG: The Ten...

Damn, Martha. I don’t know what got into Martha...

Adventures in Retail with Anthony and...

(In which Anthony and I wistfully recall working at a department store in Knoxville, TN in the early '90s.)
Anthony: Boy, what a sordid cast of characters in that place, when you look back.
me: Jeez. Yep. D___ H_____, the quietly psycho, sorta lead guy. Louie, Rick, the actor.
Anthony: There was the latently homosexual security guy, who loved to bust those 'queers' in the men's bathroom. You know who I mean...
me: Yeah, semi-creepy security dude with the molester mustache. That was pretty much the highlight of his week...
I got to where I could pretty much spot the guys who were there just to troll the bathroom. There was one dude, always wore a track suit. His hair was thinning badly, and he made the comedy even more intense by poofing it out and hairspraying it into place. It was like his head was caged in wispy, gray-black hair. He never bought a damn thing when I worked in mens' clothing, but he was there damn near every day, just roaming.
Anthony: I just know I did NOT like going into that bathroom to change lightbulbs.
me: Oh, hell no.
Remember when they closed those bathrooms one time, and some freak left a loaf of lovely brown love in the mens' dressing rooms, instead?
You were working the dock, and we just agreed we'd act like we didn't know it happened or something.
Anthony: Oh I remember that and I remember thinking "I don't care if I get fired, or what. I am NOT cleaning that up" As I recall I poured some kitty-litter looking stuff that I found with the cleaning supplies over it, pulled a rack in front of the dressing room, and left for the damn CLEANING PEOPLE! I still get my bristles up over that.
me: Hee. Oh, I was actually happy when I saw that they'd gutted that damn place and built a completely different store inside the skeleton.
me: Good times, adventures in retail.
Hey. Why did the manager, Mickey, have meth mouth? Did he just have really tiny teeth, or what?
6 minutes
Anthony: I couldn't remember his name. Good lord, I don't recall his teeth.
me: That's because they were tiny, man.

Some Questions for Michael Ian Black, Pt. 2 Michael Ian...

Stories from my youth...

I admit it; I had fun writing “Bubba’s Wooden Leg.” Mostly because I’ve been...

Viral Marketing Fooling the English (and...

Previously: * “Viral marketing gets really creepy in London”; * “Them Faceless...

Them Faceless Folk: Punking the mainstream...

Viral Marketing gets really creepy in London

Jesus don't want you to do that with your...

Jesus doesn't want to see your penis.

BBC NEWS: Tunguska at 100

“I suspect that, in other worlds, or in other parts of one...”
— Charles Fort, Lo! Fort used...

Bubba's Wooden Leg: A Parable

(Though I’ve decided to call it a ‘parable,’ this is a mostly true story.) When I...

Some Questions For Michael Ian Black, Pt. 1 So, I help...

NO FLAGS. Contextual ads suck. In this case, they’re...

More about the kid who was decapitated at Six...

11Alive.com | Atlanta, GA | Person...

Q&A: Gawker's Ian Spiegelman Interviews...

Thoughts I wish I didn’t have, pt A. Oobi,...

FATE Magazine :: True Reports of the Strange...

Journalism Jobs: Southified Stringer for the...

Unsecured Webcam Tourism, Pt. 6 Still thinking of Oksana, I...

Unsecured Webcam Tourism, Pt. 5 The first time I saw Oksana,...

Unsecured Webcam Tourism, Pt. 4 So there we were in the...

Unsecured Webcam Tourism, Pt. 3 My early morning stop in...

Unsecured Webcam Tourism, Pt. 2 Everyone was still asleep in...

Michael Ian Black: Announcing the First Ever...

Power outage in Roswell, GA

I can tell you about my power going out because I have a QWERTY keypad on my cell phone and because...

Unsecured Webcam Tourism, Pt. 1 I did some traveling last...

Anyone know what the hell this is? Google didn’t renew...

Roswell Ghost Tour

Gawker: Michael Ian Black Takes on David...

Anchorage Press Plays: The Invisible People A long time ago,...

Comments

Okay. I’ve added comments to my goddam tumblelog. Please be civil, on-topic and all that other...

UFO alert: Welsh police spot 'unusual...

Brit Police Chopper has Close Encounter |...

Custom Van vs. Talk Pretty (via randomlunatic) Michael Ian...

Michael Ian Black: Help Me Defeat David...

"I am aware of all internet traditions" -...

Most complex crop circle ever discovered in...

The Web Time Forgot - NYTimes.com

I wonder if WGST Radio in Atlanta needs a new...

(via anmoyunos) Go, Anonymous, Go. More epic win in this...

Thinking out loud. I do think, y'know.

I probably should put this post up at The True Crime Weblog. But the core readership for that blog...

Stuff I know and don't use...

Tonight I watched Atonement, the brilliant movie based on Ian McEwan’s even greater novel,...

The Anomaly Report, Pt 2

The Anomaly Report

Tornadoes: Nature's Serial Killers

“Your intelligence attains the grand summation of molecular...”
— Surrealism Server: Surrealist...

An idea...

I don’t think there’s a blogging program out there right now that makes collaborative...

“Oh, how you inflict me with wounds of paranoia and desire.”
— Surrealism Server: Surrealist...

Heat

I realized today that in spite of being a lifelong southerner, I can’t really think when the...

Dreaming of the Phantom Mower

So, a while back I wrote about the Phantom Mower. Last night I had a dream about him. In the dream...

Michael Ian Black's Blog: I pimp it, I pimp...

Ecstasy (among other things) may take down...

BREAKING: Tornado Outbreak Likely Today -...

via i27.tinypic.com I don’t know why I like this...

North Georgia Kills 368th Wealthiest Man in...

Small pimpin'...

C RA MCGUIRT: BLUE COLLAR BALLET...

The Stan Romanek Story

I knew that photo released today, supposedly of the alien...

via fc06.deviantart.com Dear God in heaven, please make the...

Of Guys Named Michael… Yes, I miss “Separated at...

LIVE COVERAGE: Space alien video shown in...

Michael Ian Black: I Am Drunk On Internet...

La Scala to stage Gore's 'Inconvenient...

'Motivational speakers' like Russell...

A while back, I had the displeasure of writing about one Carmine Baffa, an Atlanta-area...

Alex Balk - Still here.

Barnicle: Bloggers 'Nitwits Who Think They're...

COAST TO COAST AM WITH GEORGE NOORY -- You...

Balk: Blog like the fake pros!

alexbalk: Yesterday I was complaining about yet another indignity visited on me by the Internet:...

Motivational speaker faces attempted murder...

Former Gawker Blogger Emily Gould Bares Her...

‘Idol’ got its groove back in season seven -...

That's Not Racial Transcendence: Georgia...

Roswell’s weekly paper puts DailyKos in a snit |...

We’ve just received a tornado warning in my area...

Chinese Earthquake Captured in Wedding Photos...

'Unsolved Mysteries' Gets a New Look on Spike...

Awww... Look, I've got another troll!

Square America: On the Limits of Memory

Magnitude 3.1 - ALABAMA

On overhearing middle-aged rich people...

His ex needs 20 k a month “just to float.” His kids are “still cute,” and...

Dubya Goes Godwin on Obama - WSJ.com

Dave Dunn Died Twenty Years Ago

One blind man, describing his part of...

Something bad has happened at an apartment complex in Sandy Springs, GA. I have no idea what that...

FirstPerson (and iReport) are ripping you...

via www.geekologie.com Un-tooned cartoon characters. Just...

"KENNETH MARTIN DOLAN DOES NOT STROKE HIS...